Another growth mindset embedded in a famous quote that urges everyone, teens and adults, to own their lives . . . truly own them.  There is rarely a fairy godmother, fairy dust, or a prince charming to rescue us from the lives we have to live.  There are so many things we truly cannot change,  It is because of this very sentiment that I push my students to strongly consider this deeply.  I ask them lots of deep questions . . . What do you want for your life?  Are you on your way to achieving your goals?  I remind them frequently, we have to take responsibility for our choices: good, bad, or ugly.  I discuss character frequently as well. Honesty, loyalty, integrity, truth, kindness, generosity, and respect for others.

These are traits within ourselves that we can control and pay forward.  I probably give more personal examples than most, but I’ve lived through a lot of unique circumstances that really cause the students to “get it.”  For instance, they will remark that “everything has a reason.”  To which, I easily respond what would be the reason behind losing my youngest son?  They believe they are honest, but when I inquire if they lie to their parents, they are quick to say “that’s different.”  I explain how it is not different.  When one student calls another one a bad word, name, or hurts their feelings, it is not tolerated, not in my class.  In my class, we are kind, respectful and generous to each other.  If you cannot follow those rules, then you will be sent out of the class because everyone is valuable.

It is different again generationally.  My generation took on all the responsibility and to this day, even when I bear no fault, I feel guilty if one of my students suffer, or does not do well.  Sometimes, empathy and compassion can be difficult when you care so much for 180 students a year.